Are you alone on Valentine's Day? Me too, here's how to embrace it

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Having been away from my wife and daughter for the past month or so, I can agree. Being alone on Valentine's Day, I hope to reflect on the joy and love they have brought to my life.

Matthew Sims
February 13, 2025

I once wrote a story about why being alone on Valentine’s Day is underrated. Beyond trying to copy Buzzfeed’s dependence on GIFs, I stand by what was at the centre of what I wanted to say: that love has been hijacked by commercialism and loving yourself is the first step towards loving others.

However, with my wife and daughter being away on holidays, tomorrow will be the first time since I met my wife in 2021 when I will be spending Valentine’s Day alone. And I can safely say that it won’t be underrated. I still want to see my wife and my daughter and tell them how much I love them.

Being alone is a strange thing. It can make you feel safe, secure and calm. Being in love is also a strange thing, but in an opposite way. It can make you feel unsure, unsettled and erratic. But it is also such a beautiful opportunity to change and be the true person you want to be around the people you feel the most comfortable with.

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When my daughter arrived on July 4, 2023, my world turned upside down.

My understanding of myself up until that point as a partner and a husband or a son flew out the window — I could only think of myself as a father.

However, the love I had for my daughter couldn’t match up with the little love I had for myself at the time — I second-guessed myself, I doubted whether I could connect with her, I struggled to be able to help her and I considered myself to be less of a supporter to her and my wife than ever before.

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I think if Valentine’s Day is a celebration of anything, it is a celebration of the power of love, not just the value of love. Love defeated my fear that I wasn’t a good enough father or husband. Love defeats when you have an argument with someone you love. And we can only hope that love defeats the division we are only seeing more of in our society or across the globe.

I’m going to spend my Valentine’s Day evening tomorrow maybe driving up into the Dandenong Ranges and thinking about the power love has had over my life, opened me up into change and opportunity and think about how much I am looking forward to cuddling my wife and daughter when they land back in the country next week.

Take this Valentine’s Day not just as a way to say “I love you” to those around you, but look at the awesome influence love has and continues to have on the world around you.